Creating A Framework For Social Media Interactions

Paul Harvey was a famous American radio host for many decades.  He was known for telling interesting stories from different perspectives.  One of the things he used to tell his audience was that it is more important to be nice than to be right.

Now, we promised you that we wouldn’t try to convince you to accept anything we present, and we meant it. Whether or not you value being nice or being right more is entirely up to you.  We will not judge you either way.  But consider…

When you debate others online, what is your goal?  Are you trying to convince them that you are right?  Are you trying to persuade them that they are wrong?  Are you seeing who can be the most articulate?  Are you seeing who can be the most clever?  Seriously, what is your goal?

Have you picked a goal?  A reason for engaging in debate with complete strangers online?  Okay, now ask yourself, are you going to accomplish that goal by being a complete jerk?  How likely are you to prove to someone else that you are right and they are wrong, if they don’t like you?  You might back them into a corner.  Or just wear them out, so that they stop replying.  But do you really think that they went away from your interaction with new enlightenment?  Or did they go away convinced that you are an articulate jerk?

What do you accomplish by being nice?  Perhaps you don’t correct every flaw in their ill-conceived arguments.  Perhaps you allow them to go away from you, still filled with the absurd arguments that first drew them to your attention.  And perhaps you walk away with a new friend!  How much more influence can you have over a friend than you do over an enemy?

If your goal is to influence people, and to help them see things from new perspectives, how much more effective will you be if you are nice?

There is an old saying:  You lose the battle but win the war!  Imagine having the self-confidence and maturity to lose a debate but gain a friend!  A friend who will see your example, and who may some day actually be persuaded to your view point!  Instead of walking away from a single interaction thinking of you as just some random stranger on the interwebs who made them mad.